ANZIO Digital Beaten The Octopus

by Glenda.
Date: 17 September 2014

Glenda continues her story of Breast Cancer... To read the first part click HERE! the second part HERE!, and the third part HERE!

Beaten The Octopus - Lincolnshire Magazine -

So here I am – over one year on. I am pleased to say that I have beaten the octopus.

I have been poisoned, operated on and radiated and I have beaten the octopus.

The fug that resided in my brain from the chemotherapy has lifted somewhat and I have beaten the octopus.

Anyway let me begin where I left off. Damn that last article was dark wasn’t it? On the 8th of January 2014 my wonderful breast surgeon removed what was left of the tumour – the chemotherapy had shrunk it to less than 1 cm together with a couple of lymph nodes.

I had a lumpectomy – he said that the eventual outcome of a lumpectomy and mastectomy was the same – so I chose to keep my breast.

After the operation he said that he had removed the tumour and lifted me up bit – my reply was that he could have done the other one at the same time!

It was then time for the radiotherapy – it’s uncomfortable but not awful. I had 15 sessions because I joined a trial in which they see if less sessions has the same result as the more normal 20 or so.

I was a bit sore and it is quite draining and you go every day apart from the weekends until you are done. (Like a steak). My last session was on the 7th of March just in time for my 48th birthday.

I am now on Tamoxifen (it has lovely side effects) – my five year sentence.

So, what now, I’m all better now because I have beaten the octopus.....

Well not quite.....

Life Changing

I recently read an article by Dr Peter Harvey it’s on the internet – just google his name – he’s a Consultant Clinical Psychologist. He got it spot on – he talks about rollercoasters, convalescence, recovery and the loss of confidence.

Sometimes it’s hard to believe that I went through all that treatment and came out the other side so to speak. Cancer is a life changing illness and during the treatment you don’t really get time to think about it.

It’s afterwards that you reflect and although yes, you have beaten the cancer and in theory you should be full of the joys of spring, it leaves you with an awful sense of insecurity – what is this pain?, what if it’s the cancer coming back and I won’t know because no one is monitoring me anymore?

It leaves you with a sense of not quite knowing who you are anymore, when I look in the mirror, it’s like ‘who is this person? Where are your eyebrows? ‘

People have told me that I have changed – no sh*t Sherlock. I have changed – I no longer think – I like this top but maybe I shouldn’t buy it because of various (probably logical) reasons – I buy it. Because I can. And because life really is a bit too short.

But I am still me – just an altered version – you don’t come out of that as the same person you were before.

Lessons Learnt

I have learnt many lessons, one of the most poignant ones is the - you know who your friends are when the chips are down – I won’t dwell on that one.

Pumpkin never did return, I did however have a new addition to the household – the very gorgeous, and destructive Percy (pictured above).

And so...

My hair is growing back – I had to remember to shave my ‘pits’. The wig remains though as I’m not quite ready to show the world my bald patches.

I have returned to my beloved Zumba – and yes, I still have the co-ordination of a drunk goldfish….

But mainly I beat the octopus into submission.

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